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Double standards in dating what is a mentor


Laugh at his dumb jokes. Dating double standards are ridiculous, because even when you do all of that, you still get screwed — metaphorically, of course. Basically, if you have any sense of autonomy at all, all roads pretty much lead to getting ghosted. Bob wanted to sleep with me. Now I was on my period — I know, I apologize for even mentioning this somehow still taboo completely normal bodily function — so I knew sex was off the table. Because most guys are not into period sex. Ew, periods are gross.

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Then he pushes again. You know, girl cooties or something. But more seriously, it also felt really personal and unnecessary, and I just got the vibe that I would definitely be judged.

Like, what purpose does this serve? You doing some kind of sociological survey for the good of mankind? Because otherwise I feel like any questions about sex math are just for the sake of your own ego, and brother, it is not going to end well. Boy, was I right about that. I totally could have lied here.

Dating double standards are ridiculous,...

Or hell, I could have said I was a virgin. I have big eyes and porcelain skin. I basically look like a Disney cartoon.

I'm my least outspoken self...

He would have believed it. And you know the sickest thing? So finally, after he persisted… and persisted… and persisted — dude would NOT let it go — I told him the truth.

And let me tell you, he did not like my answer. Homeboy got up and RAN out of my apartment. Like, Usain Bolt smiling at the paparazzi ran.

Right out of my apartment. I was stunned speechless for a minute. But then I texted him, like… WTF?! Not really sure how I was a liar, seeing as my honesty had just gotten me into trouble. He wanted me to come out and talk, but forget that. Because you know what I realized? This dude spent all night trying to get me to sleep with him.

Then literally bolted out of my apartment at the notion of me sleeping with someone else. As women we apparently have to be both Mary Magdalene and the Virgin Mary.

Shout out to Jessica Williams. So for any other women out there dealing with patriarchal bullshit like this, I want to share a few reminders:. Your sexual history is your business. And it is nothing to be ashamed of.

It's up to you to...

No one else gets to determine your worth. Who cares what anyone else thinks? Least of all Bob from OkCupid. What does he know? How are we even still having this discussion? Like, women like sex. Planned Parenthood is not just an abortion clinic. Am I leaving anything out? Look, we may not be able to control the rest of the morons in our society, or how they decide to treat us. But what we can do is be totally, completely and unapologetically, percent ourselves whenever it is safe to do so.

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